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Under their “Festive Sweaters” section, Amazon has really upped their game for silly holiday sweaters just in time for Black Friday and Cyber Monday deals. Time to pick up your Christmas Sloth sweater for 62% off!
For example, this sloth sweater is just amazing and is guaranteed to get all the ladies at your company holiday party. You’ll notice this particular sloth has gotten onto the legal marijuana train as well, judging by the face he’s making.
If you’re feeling frisky, check out this T-Rex! He is wearing a sweater himself and his tiny arms don’t fill the whole sleeves – so meta! He’s both cute and cool; and just look at how happy the guy wearing it looks. For extra points, hold your own arms inside the sleeves and make T-Rex noises.
For the ladies, we have Jesus high-fiving Santa. On a beautifully textured green background you’re sure to call attention to the fact that you’re the most festive person in the room.
If you’re feeling less Jesus-ey and more Unicorny (get it, corny?), check out this dapper unicorn in red. Even though Laura N. says “This was a hit at an ugly sweater party.” in the reviews – I can’t figure out what could possibly be ugly about this magestic beast.
Speaking of ugly unicorns, check out this guy who drank enough egg nog to barf out an assortment of candy and snowflakes. Don’t ask us how the snowflakes didn’t melt in his stomach acid, or why he looks like a donkey with a horn, just enjoy your ugly sweater competition trophy.
Everything about this Game of Thrones referencing Santa on a throne of candy canes says “look out, we’ve got a badass over here”. People will surely stay out of your way wearing this one, as they’ll have no choice but to respect your political prowess.
Speaking of llamas (ok, no one even mentioned llamas, but we’re talking about them now damn it!), check out this beautiful llama. Not only is he wearing a real scarf that hangs off the sweater, but there are tiny llamas in the design in the background!
Here’s a cute little Christmas pug sweater. If anyone says this is an ugly holiday sweater I’ll personally have words with them – this is the cutest little puggy ever! You have permission to give anyone sass who insults the precious pug.
And then there’s this cock sweater. Do with it as you please.