The cousin explainer
July 3 2015 by Ben Harrison
This review is from: WMA Blue Amazon Kindle Waterproof Case Cover Protective Bag Pouch
Got this for the Mother-in-law for bath time, hoping it’d be crap, her kindle would slip out and electrocute her. So far, this bloody thing is staying in one piece. Great for waterproof kindling, crap for murder. | Permalink
I already won my next interview before I show up, I can feel it!
Insulated Shacket – Not for ninjas
Not for ninjas
on February 27, 2017Dear aspiring ninjas – this is not the black jacket for you. The incredibly loud fabric will give you away long before you reach your target. With every movement sounding like you’re rolling around in a cheap plastic grocery bag, you can kiss your operational success score goodbye, my nefarious friend.
Now, I know what you’re thinking: “This might be a good jacket for those days on the town when I’m relaxing between ninja night operations.” Nope, you’re wrong. Everybody knows that ninjas have lean torsos combined with incredible upper-body strength. This jacket fits tight in the arms and baggy in the body. Shockingly baggy in the body, in fact. It will not cut the attractive silhouette that you are looking for. Trust me.
Shoulders are cut for good movement, though, so you’re all set if you’re planning on retiring from ninja-hood soon and want to let your arms atrophy and your gut expand. In that case, you’ll be able to draw your ninja bow in comfort using your spindly little arms.
I’m 6’3" tall and a fit 200 lbs. I ordered this jacket in a size large. It is going back. Permalink
Senior Woman with Asthma Inhaler Wall Decal
But it’s ok, you can put it next to your Nick Cage pillow
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Top Customer Reviews:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Immortalize Your Loved Ones
ByConnie P.on March 20, 2016Size: 24"H x 21"W – MediumI didn’t know how to properly honor Grandma when she passed away. Framed photograph seemed too cliché, keeping her ashes wasn’t something she wanted, wearing her clothing seemed a bit morbid and naming my firstborn after her was out of the question. Sorry but Agnes just isn’t something I feel comfortable naming my child. Then, I found Wallmonkeys and found that I could memorialize my dear, dead grandmother in a way that not only resonated with me but kept her memory alive. I always grew up loving wall decals and I thought “Why not make my grandmother into a tasteful wall decal”. This way I can remember her in a sentimental way and my kids can remember her not as boring grandma in the old photograph, but as cool, hip grandma as a sleek sticker that is on my wall. I really love that it’s not some posed picture, but grandma doing something she loved, obtaining oxygen, in a picture she wasn’t ready for. It’s like she’s still here with us, but a lot cooler and asking less invasive questions. So thanks Wallmonkeys, for making grandma live on, forever, in my house, permanently on my wall (trust me, that sticker DOES NOT come off).
5 comments|344 people found this helpful.
5.0 out of 5 stars
ByMaggieon March 19, 2016Size: 24"H x 21"W – MediumPut it up right next to my framed oil painting of an old man measuring his pills into a daily dispenser. Looks amazing!
Comment|191 people found this helpful.
5.0 out of 5 stars
… opted for the jumbo size version and it looks great over my fireplace
ByC. Cooperon March 13, 2016Size: 24"H x 21"W – MediumI opted for the jumbo size version and it looks great over my fireplace. I get a lot of comments about this but most of the positive comments come from my stoner friends. They wish they can toke to that age and they wonder where she got that miniature bong.
Comment|144 people found this helpful.
5.0 out of 5 stars
I was looking for a large wall decal of a …
ByIan Johnsonon May 29, 2016Size: 24"H x 21"W – Medium|Verified PurchaseI was looking for a large wall decal of a stock photo of a woman using an inhaler, and this fit the bill perfectly. Thank you!
1 comment|95 people found this helpful.
3.0 out of 5 stars
these prices are asthmatic
Bycelesteon March 26, 2016Size: 24"H x 21"W – MediumReally takes me breath away
Comment|117 people found this helpful.
5.0 out of 5 stars
F-You Tony Romo!
ByBBrion July 8, 2016Size: 24"H x 21"W – MediumMy daughter went away to college in Texas and came home a Dallas Cowboys fan. She asked for a Tony Romo “FatHeadz” cling for her dorm room this semester. You know what she got? She got THIS. In Extra Large. You know why? Because F-You Tony Romo, that’s why.
Postscript – My wife did eventually break down and get her the Tony Romo wall cling. When removing it from the package, it brushed up against the sofa and dislocated it’s shoulder and is now out 4 to 6 weeks.
2 comments|97 people found this helpful.
3.0 out of 5 stars
Bysoylentgreenon April 4, 2016Size: 24"H x 21"W – MediumTotally cured my premature ejaculation problems, but created a whole other set of problems which I must now solve with more adhesive wall decals. Be warned, wallmonkeys is a vicious cycle that never ends.
Comment|108 people found this helpful.
Browsing around Horse Head masks, as one must occassionally do… I saw this gem of a response:
If I plugged the holes up, filled it with water and put it in my freezer, do you think I could create an ice sculpture of a horse head with this?
asked by JJmann on April 20, 2015
Because the mask is pretty large on the inside, the amount of water it would hold would probably be too heavy and cause the mask to lose its shape. It would be a very deformed looking horse head ice sculpture. But, interesting idea!
CostumeVille SELLER answered on April 20, 2015
Comment | 0 of 1 found this helpful.
Et tu brute?
Now someone just needs to make a Jon Snow version…. too soon?
1,366 of 1,456 people found the following review helpful
At least, no matter what new lows life has to offer, my coffee will always stay hot., August 25, 2014
By William D. Powell – Verified Purchase
This review is from: Zojirushi SM-SA60-BA Stainless Steel Mug, 20-Ounce, Black (Kitchen)
I bought the 20-ounce Zojirushi SM-SA60-BA the week after I got married so that I could keep my coffee warm on the commute to and from my new job downtown. It is literally the world’s best travel mug. I could put steaming hot coffee in it in the morning, and if I forgot it in my truck I would still have steaming hot coffee for the drive home. No kidding! It’s incredible.
This was an exciting time for me. My time with Jennifer was limited but boundless in its glory. When I wasn’t working, Jennifer and I would go hiking at the park, take road trips, sit up late and watch the stars. And, of course, have long nights of passionate love making. And through it all, my 20-ounce Zojirushi SM-SA60-BA provided me with hot, fresh coffee and a sleek, ergonomic feel. It’s amazingly well designed and made to last.
That was seven years ago. These days, Jennifer is as cold and emotionally distant as an uncharted asteroid. Now the most passionate conversations we have involve either our fiberoptic internet bandwidth or Your Damn Mother. At work, I am merely a shadow defined by once-authentic ambition. Original thought at my office is as pointless as a Libertarian vote, and my commute is like a scene from Walking Dead.
I’m writing this on my iPhone as I sit behind a third-world chicken truck on I-35. I’m numbing myself to waste another eight hours at The Bad Place and fantasizing about replacing the painful vacuum of affection from She Who Cannot Read Oil Change Reminder Stickers with that new girl from logistics. But now that I think about it, the one constant source of warmth and comfort in my life is still the 20-ounce Zojirushi SM-SA60-BA.
Buy one. Buy one now, or feel only the chill yearning for an early grave that poor life decisions and emotional complacency can reap. | Permalink
9,753 of 10,050 people found the following review helpful
SHE TOOK THE HOUSE, THE DOG AND THE 401K. BUT I STILL CONTROL THE THERMOSTAT., March 26, 2014
By The General
This review is from: Honeywell RTH9580WF WiFi 9000 Color Touchscreen Thermostat, 8.06 sq in., Premier Silver (Tools & Home Improvement)
My former wife loves to take expensive vacations. We live in Ohio, which doesn’t exactly have extravagant places to see unless you like to watch grass growing or interstate construction. While we make OK money, I’m convinced she felt the need to single handedly improve the US economy by taking elaborate vacations: Broadway shows in New York City, gambling in Las Vegas, Spa’s in Arizona, sightseeing in San Francisco. The airlines know me so well they ask about my dog when I call to make reservations. His name is Fred.
In my attempt to try and save whatever I could so the princess could have her nice things I bought this Honeywell Wi-Fi enabled device so I could adjust the HVAC while we were away piling up massive amounts of debt on Mickey Mouse watches. I thought we could save a few bucks by keeping the temp cool in the winter and warm in the summer. The device was easy to install. I did not have the “blue” connector so I had to re-purpose the green one – this required an adjustment to the actual HVAC unit in our home. There are plenty of videos on Youtube to demonstrate how to do this. Within an hour I was up and running.
The device works flawlessly. You can adjust the temp from anywhere you have a Wi-Fi or cellular signal. Little did I know that my ex had found someone that had a bit more money than I did and decided to make other travel plans. Those plans included her no longer being my wife and finding a new travel partner (Carl, a banker). She took the house, the dog and a good chunk of my 401k, but didn’t mess with the wireless access point or the Wi-Fi enabled Honeywell thermostat.
Since this past Ohio winter has been so cold I’ve been messing with the temp while the new love birds are sleeping. Doesn’t everyone want to wake up at 7 AM to a 40 degree house? When they are away on their weekend getaways, I crank the heat up to 80 degrees and back down to 40 before they arrive home. I can only imagine what their electricity bills might be. It makes me smile. I know this won’t last forever, but I can’t help but smile every time I log in and see that it still works. I also can’t wait for warmer weather when I can crank the heat up to 80 degrees while the love birds are sleeping. After all, who doesn’t want to wake up to an 80 degree home in the middle of June? | Permalink
Dean Holtz says:
Well done, Revenge is best served at whatever temperature you see fit.
But don’t worry, the drone is ok…
Don’t worry though, we found out who posted this question:
“Does this have the capacity to lift an infant?”
“I tested this and it was able to lift an infant only two feet before slamming into the ground. Lucky there was no damage to the drone itself as the infant made a nice safety cushion.”